Wednesday, 18 May 2011
I spent most of yesterday going over and over things in my head. I kept coming up against one unassailable fact – each and every time I get involved with Mum’s affairs, I end up hurt. In the past two months, I have felt as though I could, literally, die from the stress and worry and what it’s done for my work output doesn’t bear thinking about.
I have finally made a decision. I have decided to totally step away. I can't argue with people who won't listen to me and my mother is so far gone, she won’t even know.
Now that I’ve made up my mind, I already feel better, but what’s really strange is this - as I made my decision I thought, ‘now things will start to get better for me.
Once again I have to thank people like Robert, Carol and Helen who have offered me so many wise words and encouragement. You really have helped me so much.
I had planned to go to Spice tonight, but I’ve decided to put it off. It’s been one hell of a busy week and I’m feeling utterly worn out. It’s my much postponed speed dating session tomorrow and I really don’t want to miss that. I am fairly sure nobody will tick me (I’m going to be the oldest one there after all), but you never know…….
Now that I’m aware of Spice I can keep a watch for their next new members evening in Leeds and will definitely go to that (unless of course I’ve had a better offer!)