jack's funeral, Fiction Feast and a 'naughty' proposal

It’s been a strange few days.

Yesterday was Jack’s funeral. It brought back vivid memories of my mother’s funeral. Fortunately it was more like Gareth’s in that it was a celebration of Jack’s life with music he’d chosen. Best of all when we left the chapel, he’d asked for Hey Jude to be playing and that we should all sing as we walked out. That helped to keep away the tears but at the same time, it made me sad that I’d never talked about music with him. Afterwards dozens of people went back to Good Neighbours for good and tea and coffee. When it was over, I bottled out and called my ex as I didn’t want to go home to an empty house.

As a complete contrast to this, I received an email proposition. Somebody I met recently, I won’t say where, offered to be my lover. This was both a shock (his message was rather blunt) and a boost as this is the first time anyone’s shown an interest in my ‘charms’ for years.  I turned him down for reasons I won’t go into, but who knows, maybe the wind’s about to change.

I have a story in Octobers Fiction Feast which is two months in arrow. Shame I haven’t managed to send them many new stories recently. I’ve been much too busy with other things. I really do need to decide what I want to do. I DO know that getting back to more creative stuff is near the top of the list.

This morning I tweeked a story that The People’s Friend might be interested. I also found another one that I’d sent to Fiction Feast years ago so I rewrite that too and will post it off later.

In an hour or so I’m off to Newark for the judging of the MABEL BARBER competitor.  I have to say I’m nervous. I don’t know the venue, or the people and though I have an idea what they expect of me, it's still daunting. I’d wanted to get there early, find somewhere to grab a snack and then make my way, by taxi, to the venue. Instead I’m being picked up from h station and taken back to somebody’s house. I should have said no, but you can’t, not when people think they’re being kind.

I’ve also decided to go to the next NAWG writers retreat at Wentworth in November (see www.nawg.co.uk for details). I hope they have single en suite rooms as I’ve never been there before.

I’ve started taking Bach’s flower remedies to see if they help me feel more positive. A friend has advised me to look into Gestalt therapy too.

I still haven’t managed to book a proper holiday…..